Ebb & Flow

This is the first piece of work I made when I moved to Scarborough.

It is called  'Ebb & Flow: Tidal Prozac' 2010

As a very brief explanation, this piece represented how I saw my mental state at the time of moving here; the boxes signifying my need for solitude, but also attempting to acknowledge my relative insignificance when set against the backdrop of the historical context of geological layers and the inevitable ebb and flow of the tide. There was a line drawn, in thread, which represented 'the norm' and the boxes were deliberately set above or below it. The line was taut, secure and comforting in its strength, and confident in its air of being 'right'.

The reason I am blogging about this piece again, 3 years on, is that I noticed this morning that 

'the norm' thread has broken and I began to muse about the significance of this.

There may well be no significance, but I've noticed it, and it's made me think.

Here you can see both ends of the broken thread. One hanging at the far end, and one lying along the bottom of the box. I think that it's current position will be temporary. I am sure that gravity and time will continue to have an effect.

It's quite difficult to get a picture of the thread, but it is just hanging in mid-air, like a cobweb, with no apparent means of support, and of course all the tension has gone from the line.

I was thinking yesterday that moving in and out of depression is like flicking an electric light switch; but not being able to remember the the state of light or dark which came before it.  This thread now reminds me of a delicate power-line hanging between pylons, spanning the space between the boxes, but expectant; like a washing line waiting for its inevitable load. But somehow you know that even the slightest weight exerted onto it will see it drop to join the rest of its length along the bottom of the box. The taut strength of 'the norm' is too hard to maintain, and really serves no purpose other than to judge or to compare.

I wonder whether 'the norm' is something I no longer aspire to, or feel the need to measure myself against. Hopefully I am beginning to appreciate, and be able to manage, my own ebb and flow in a more productive way.